You might recall that I have a small farm in my back yard. I work my little farm every day, picking pickles and checking the tomatoes, which are only just now starting to turn red. The Brussels sprouts are even showing some growth in the sprouty area. You know what I have not been able to pick? Strawberries!
I have two strawberry plants with many a little strawberry growing on them. Have I had a chance to sample said strawberries? No! Want to know why? I have thieves in my garden! That’s right, someone is brazen enough to just waltz right into my farm and eat any strawberry that is just turning a delicious shade of red.
At first, I thought it was this guy:
But he hasn’t been around in a while. I think the dogs caught onto him and chased him over into the neighbor’s yard (who has much better
tasting flowers than I do).
Then I thought it might be this little guy, who has been hanging around for the last couple of weeks:
But I’ve never seen him near the farm and besides, I’m pretty sure he doesn’t like strawberries.
So I did some research at Dr. Google Greenthumb and found out that robins like strawberries. Robins! I have a lot of those. Dammit. The farm is situated off to the side of the house, so I can’t just look out there to see any thievery going on. Even if I did, I would have to then go wake up a dog to run out there and do her job of “protecting persons and property”. By then, the strawberries would be gone anyway.
I have had to take drastic measures.
I mean, what else is there to do? I would like to have a strawberry or two sometime this summer. If I don’t take a stand now, I’m just asking for trouble. What would be next? My silver? (if I had any) My jewelry? (hmm, not so much of that around here, either) Okay, so maybe I’m not a thief’s big payday, but those are my strawberries, dammit! I have decided the only course of action is to use the services of an armed guard.
Sometimes you just do what you gotta do and hope no one gets hurt.