A couple of years ago, two of my besties came to visit me in Austin. They were my next door neighbors when we lived in Maryland, many years ago. Bitzie now lives in Oklahoma and BFF with an “i”, who has the husband with an ex-brother-in-law named Crash, still lives in the ‘hood in Maryland.
After we had dropped BFF with an “i” off at the airport in San Antonio, Bitzie and I took the back road home so we could chat. And chat we did! Which is pretty much what we do whenever we get together. Chat, chat, chat. I was sharing with her the stories of my mom, who was driving me nuts with some silly thing or another. And then I told her how the other BFF thought her mom was equally unnerving at times. I just went on and on, since I had a captive audience. When I had exhausted the subject of my mom and her antics and arguments, Bitzie turned to me and said, “At least you still have your mom.”
How could I forget that she had lost her mom a few months earlier? I felt like an absolute heel. Bitzie was so kind and didn’t take offense to my rambling on about my mom and her shenanigans. But then, she is a kind woman anyway. She just wanted to remind me to be thankful for what I had.
Last night, as I was at the US-led Cinco de Mayo party, (which was a blast! I’ll tell you about the wonderful food, and share my shrimp recipe, next week) there was much talk about who was doing what for Mother’s Day. Lots of brunches. Man, I’ll tell you…us ladies can eat!
Anyway, Chef Sue was telling me that she is very angry at her mother and hasn’t spoken to her in a couple of weeks. I was shocked! Who could be mad at their mother?? Chef Sue turned to me, gave me a hug and said she thought about me as she picked up the phone to call her mom, to invite her for brunch on Sunday. She said to me, “At least I have a mother to be mad at.” I’m so glad she called her mom, because that’s the truth – she has a mother to be mad at.
So listen up.
I don’t care if your mother gets on your very last nerve, eats the last cookie, tells you how to drive, what to wear, how to do your hair and asks for the 3467621364th time when are you going to get married/get divorced/have a baby/get a job/quit your job/move out/move back and when’s the last time you cleaned this toilet?
You will miss her when she is gone.
Every year for the last four years, I have driven my mom and her sister to the family cemetery, in Kentucky, so they can put flowers on the graves of their parents. I never once thought of it as a chore. It was an honor. It was something I looked forward to, year after year.
This year, CGMan will be driving me up, so I can place flowers on the graves of my mom and stepdad, as well as my grandparents. It certainly won’t be as fun as it has been in years past, but it will still be an honor and remain something I look forward to, every year.
For those of you whose moms have gone on, I know this weekend you will miss her more than you do every single day. I’m so sorry for your hurt. I wrap my heart around each and every one of you.
And those with moms still around?
HUG ‘EM IF YOU GOT ‘EM!!
Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms!
I want to wish a very special Mother’s Day to my “other mothers” - ORMom and CGMom.
I love you so much!
Mother’s Day 2010
Dawn, CGBro and Mommy