1. Last week, before I left for the airport, I put on my best bra and a little dab of the good perfume, along with the rest of my clothes. If there was any possibility of someone getting intimate, I might as well wear the good undies, right? It would be just my luck that I didn’t get felt up by the TSA. I didn’t even get to go through the naked x-ray machine. I lost those 2 pounds for nothing! I’m not sure whether to be bummed that no one wanted to feel between my ta-tas or be happy that I appear to be such a stand up citizen. I never could pull off the bad girl look.
2. I made some cookies for the open house we had on Sunday. They were butterscotch chip cookies. The recipe called for corn flakes, but I didn’t have any (am I the only one who pictures Frosted Flakes as being the only corn flake out there?) so I used grape nut flakes, because I’m a grown up. Well, I think I just invented the next hit breakfast food! They are SO good! If it has grape nuts in it, it has to be good for you, right? In fact, the recipe called for one cup of the butterscotch chips and 2 cups of the flakes. There you have it, twice as much healthy-for-you ingredients than the thing that makes it a cookie. You’re welcome.
3. Even if you aren’t married, I know each and every one of you knows a man (or are one, Hi Ron!). Can someone tell me why men point with their middle finger? They don’t do it if they’re pointing down the road or anything. Or maybe they do and that’s what CGMan is doing in the car, giving that guy directions. Anyway, they do it when they’re pointing to something on a piece of paper. Or a map. It is just weird when CGMan points out the entire route on the map with his bird finger. I find myself staring at it, wondering why he isn’t using his pointer finger. Isn’t that what that first finger is supposed to do? POINT?
4. I’ve buried the saint in the flower bed, I’ve baked cookies (and breakfast food) for prospective buyers. I haven’t had Brussels sprouts or cabbage for over two months now, just keeping the inside smelling nice. I have even moved Farty McFarterson and Gassy Gasgirl to Virginia to remove the dog smells, hair and footprints. And yet, no one has bought my house. Is there some magic potion, lotion or incantation that I can spread around? I would even do some funky dance, but with my moves, I’d probably bring about a hurricane or something.
5. I’m not liking being here by myself. When the dogs were here, I would make dinner with them in mind, because I did share. A little bit. But now that I’m here alone, I’m thinking potato chips and wine sounds like a well balanced meal.
So what’s been going on with you?