Today is Wednesday. I like Wordless Wednesday because even when I’m in a writing slump, I can usually whip out a picture or two of my fabulously attractive dogs and call it a day. I had every intention of doing that today, but I have PTSD and just can’t think of cute, silly pictures right now.
You see, last night, I was sitting on my recliner with my phat Phoebe, when she jumped up and lunged off the chair at something she saw on the floor. Just about the time she landed near it, I saw that it was a scorpion. A big one. Just strolling along my living room rug! Because Phoebe was interested in something walking along the floor, Zoe was instantly interested, too. I didn’t want them messing with it, so I screamed, which
woke up caused CGMan to leap off his chair, with no shoes on, scattering the dogs and giving the scorpion a chance to get away. He finally found it as it was walking out from the opposite end of the coffee table. A hefty man-sized TWAP! with a size 11 flip flop was all it took to kill the bastard. But I wasn’t convinced, so I had him TWAP! it again.
After checking to make sure it hadn’t brought the family, CGMan assured me there were no more and that it was safe to get off my chair. He did wonder, though, how it got in. I’ve been told they can pick the lock. (I’ve just realized the last big scorpion scare happened on Tuesday, as well. I think we need to cancel Tuesdays)
I. Hate. Scorpions.
Because I now have PTSD, I am going to therapy today. Retail therapy. Now that all the children are back in school, I can shop in relative peace and quiet. Hallelujah. No more ill-behaved children being allowed to run willy nilly through the store, while disinterested parents continue to cajole and plead for them come try on this pair of pants. I say leave the kids at home with dad, do all the shopping, take it home and say, “This is what you’re wearing to school this year. Period” It worked for me.
For those of you who tune in only on Wednesdays to see what charming picture I might post, your trip has not been wasted.